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Forth Reich of Yuri
Nothing much is know about the Forth Reich of Yuri, the faction founded around... I dunno which was right into the depths of the Bolshevik Civil War which broke out in... FUCK which separated Russia. also some shit happened involving two lesbians and a cup but lets not get into that. The Foundation So this guy called Yuri goes to a bar and says "Dude, I should like make a Reich and take over Russia" GUESS WHAT HAPPENED NEXT! Divisions of the Reich XCom Rookies, rookies, and MORE FUCKING ROOKIES, with training that almost as good as a conscript, the ability to aim almost as well as a blind retard and with the tactical knowledge of a Call of Duty player XCom rookies make the formidable (and very very expandable) meat shield of the Reich. ZE VOLF BRIGADE Everyone who isn't a rookie or a Druid is part of ZE VOLF BRIGADE, yeah thats about it.... Druids Some of the most dangerous men in the world, the Druids are the Reichs most feared devision who are almost as scary as Putin out in the field. Manufactors of the Reich Druidic Gear Inc. Adolf and Sons Nazi Weaponry Putin's House Dave's House of Tools Shivan Weapons Inc. JC and Paul's Bomb Empire Notable Command Flagship >2011 >Using a navy Infantry The 4th Reich's infantry is divided into three Brigades. Firstly theres XCom, bunch of cannon fodder, often armed with shit. Then ZE VOLF BRIGADE, aka everyone else, and last the Druids, Who are very dangerous. Tier 1 Infantry *''Nigger - ''Niggers used for operating the Reich labor. They steal supplies to fund Yuri's war machine at the army's very unique mobile Supply Center, known as KFC-Truck. They are armed with TEC-9s, allowing them to cap their attackers asses; when on supply duty, the miners will follow the KFC-Truck like good Niggers. *''Conscript -'' Cannon fodder for the 4th Reich, cheap soldiers which can capture structures and armed with a standard M-16 "Jams All Day Erry Day" rifle, pathetic against everything, these soldiers are shit. *''Molotov Grenadier - ''Basic anti-tank, WAIT A FUCKING SECOND. Anti-Infantry Conscripts which can throw Molotov Cocktails at their target, the Molotov Grenadier is good against infantry and peoples houses . Molotov Grenadiers can deploy a small explosive charge to damage buildings or tanks as long as JC Denton isn't around. *''Stick Trooper - ''Anti-Everything Troopers. These soldiers are the Reich's anti-everything personnel which can deal good damage against everything with his Stick, he is a good soldier when you need to poke the enemy in the eye, very powerful if used properly. *''Dealer - ''Armed with well over a ton of Cocaine and heavy armor, the Dealers keep morale (and the troops) high, they also have a pistol (that is somehow more powerful than a 200mm cannon) for defense against Bustas (which means he will kill CJ in one hit so be careful). *''Serial Killing Engineer - ''Field supporters and Serial Killers of the 4th Reich. These soldiers carry a toolbox full of handy tools which he can use to fix up structures, murder various people and help with defending a location by placing fried chicken and calling the cops, he is also capable of planting Booby-traps and killing weaker soldiers with a favorite hammer (called Dave) Tier 2 Infantry *''Crazy Ivan - ''That guy is from Red Alert 2. *''Snoipa - ''Aussies with a sniper rifle who never fucking move and kill everyone, can cause the enemy units to ragequit anc call you a gay no life faggot. *''Tesla Trooper - ''Also from Red Alert 2. *''Desolator - ''Guess what? hes from Red Alert 2. Tier 3 Infantry *''Boris ''- BORIS HAS ARRIVED, HE WILL MAKE TRAITOROUS DOGS EAT LEAD AND CAN CALL MIGS. *''Druid - ''The very best men of the Reich, Druids are very dangerous individuals who will fuck your enemy up, also they are very dangerous. Vehicles So Yuri realizing that spamming infantry isn't all that great said "Hey guys lets get vehicles as well, those are always good to spam" YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED NEXT Tier 1 Vehicles *''BRDM-4 "Wild Raider" Scout (Wild Raider) - ''Well basically its a scout vehicle that can scout and carry two guys for some reason. did I mention it can scout? *''BTR-80 "Razor" Flak Crawler (Razor) - ''What happens when you take a transport, give it an AA gun and fill it with five possibly homosexual Canadians? You get the Razor. *''T-60 "Wolf" Light Tank (Wolf) - ''Light Armoured Tanks of the 4th Reich with a 90mm Cannon. All though they are mostly one of Russia's well-known variants of the T-55 Anvil, the tanks shit and must be spammed to kill even a conscript, the Wolf's cannons are smaller than SmasherJackson's dick. Most Wolf tanks were stolen by niggers, therefore they're armed with a rap cannon (which causes ear rape to enemies per tank). Tier 2 Vehicles *''Bear - ''OH SHIT SON ITS A BEAR! * *''BMP-DMT "Radiator" Desolator Mortar Track (Radiator) - ''Its a mortar, yeah it sucks. Tier 3 Vehicles * *''TT-124 "Steel Knuckle" Heavy Tank (Steel Knuckle) - ''Yuri was jelly of China having all the nice tanks, so he stole the Overlord and made it look just like the shitty apocalypose tank from Red Alert 3 (why not 2 Jackson? was it too god for you?) *''BM-V3 "Smerch" MLRS (V-3 Smerch) - SPAM SPAM SPAMM ALL DAY LONG'' *''W-S-2030 "Magnetron" Magnet-Artillery (Mangetron) - ''As the 4th Reich gotten more and more insane, one man decided to make an artillery piece based on magnets, many laughs were had. Misc / Missions / Unique Vehicles *''KCF-Truck - ''This vehicle is a mobile supply center, which allows the Reich to save money and Keeps the niggers busy, every vehicle has a clone of a batshit insane guy called Harley Filben who is whack out paranoid and carries a knife (for shanking people who get to close), his wolf (very powerful unit that can destroy everything in one hit and take over the country) and a flamethrower (to keep the niggers working). Can also place turrets, bombs and is upgradable with a second wolf and AK-47s for the niggers. *''N-G-419 "Scammer" Identity Theft Vehicle (Scammer) - ''Mobile internet cafe carrying a group of Nigerian scammers, can steal enemy identity, money and bank accounts. Can also spam the enemy email with 419 scams which will make permanently disable all his base defenses and cause some of his units to defect to your side. *''Vladimir Putin's Car (Bad Vlads Car) - ''Seriously fucking heavy tankused by Putin as a car, Armed with a pair of 200mm cannons, an auto eye pocking device, a squad of Druids (very dangerous men), and over 20lbs of pussy and ass. can be upgraded with a flamethrower, catapult, a tesla coil and a second squad of Druids (very dangerous men) Aircraft So after more vodka Yuri and his guys got some planes and helicopters and shit. Tier 1 Aircraft *''Sukhoi Su-35 "Sultan" Fighter (Eagle) - ''Yuri stole that from Turkey, pilots are Turks and Bosnians because Yuri hates Serbia. *''Mi-8 "Hips Mover" Hentai Craft (Hips Mover) - ''When in doubts, make the enemies hips move on their own. *''KO-43 "Inspirer" Propaganda Airship (Inspirer) - ''It sucks Tier 2 Aircraft *''Havoc in a Chopper (Havoc) - ''Remember Havoc from Renegade? well that crazy nigga stole a helicopter and is now kicking ass for Mother Russia. *''Halo (Halo) - ''I think halo is pretty cool guy, eh kills alliens and doens't afraid of anything. *''CRICKEY "Sting Ray" Stealth Dive Bomber (Sting Ray) - ''First used in the war against Australia, the Sting Ray shown its superiority when Steven Arvine (who single handedly took down a regiment of Druids) was killed by one, effectively ending the war. *''Mail Delivery System (faget) - UR A FAGET'' Tier 3 Aircraft *''MiG-52 "Eradicator" Tesla Bomber (Eradicator) - ''Boring. *''B-Movie Material (Plan 9) - YOU SEE YOU SEE YOUR STUPID MINDS! STUPID! STUPID!'' *''KO-67 "Kirov" Class Dreadnought Airship (Kirov) -'' KIROV REPORTING! *''Putin's Airship (Putin's Airship) - ''You think Putin's Car was bad enough? well take a look at that fucker. armed with two squads of Elite Druids (extremely dangerous people) led by JC "Jesus Christ" Denton (Effectively rendering the Airship and all surrounding units immune to BOMBS), a bunch of beams that cause people to explode and speaker that tells the enemy that Putin is here, making them shit themselves and allowing the Elite Druids (extrememly dangerous people) to kill them with NEGATIVE resistance (they enemy commits suicide because Elite Druids are extremely dangerous people) Generals Specific Units Rush General Units Basically all of the above but with 500% higher speed, no tech requirements and for free. Turtule General Units Attacking? Nigga I just build defenses. Nigger General Units With the niggers proving as useful units the Nigger general has some handy tricks up his sleeves.. * BIX NOOD (Ape) - ''BIX NOOD * ''KCF Employee (Fried Chicken Supplier) - '''''This man works for KFC, greatly raising the the moral of all Niggers, N-G-419's, BIX NOOD and other Nigger General units. More Units to be added... Hipster General Units Units are too mainstream. Druids General Units You thought normal Druids and Elite Druids were dangerous enough? well for this man every unit is a Druid, very dangerous indeed. *TT-118 "Drood" Heavy Druid Tank (Drood) - The most dangerous tank in the game.'' More Units to be added... Missiles Yuri has missiles, shits cool. *Ganef SA-4 (Ganef Missile) - 'Basically its weak. *Todestrank TA-1 (Todestrank Missile) - ''Basically its shit. *''Phantom P-V-R (Phantom Missile) - 'Thats a nice horde of tanks, would be a real shame if something was to happen to it. Buildings Yuri has buildings as well, they are pretty useful because they are all bunkers (yes even the stone circle) which means he needs no power unlike the pig disgusting other factions. *Yuri's House - 'Yuri lives here, its also the center of command for all the Reichs plans and shit. *XCom HQ - ''Trains your basic infantry to die, a very important building. *''Spam Center - ''You build tanks and planes here. *''Druidic Stone Circle - Very dangerous.'' *''Missile Whoring Center - ''Allows you to spam missiles. *''Patrick Batemans House - ''Allows the player to get double the infantry, can also impress your enemies with doubles causing them to defect. *''Putins House - ''Makes the enemy shit themselves and run away out of fear of Putin, Can build Putin's Car, Airship and launch nukes. *''Large Hadron Collider - ''Enemies are somehow winning? Phantoms and Nukes are not enough? SUMMON A FUCKING BLACK HOLE! Upgrades *Basic Training - XCom Rookies and Conscripts will actually be able to hit the enemy when attacking *Mosin Nagants - Gives Conscipts the legendary Mosin Nagant, increasing their rate of fire, damage and accuracy. *Grenades - Molotov Grenadiers can now use grenades, turning them into an extremely overpowered unit. *Cyanide Laced Sticks - Stick Troopers are now even more powerful. *Anti Armor Sticks - Stick Troopers can poke vehicles as well, combined with the Cyanide upgrade they can steal vehicles. *Personal Protection - Dealers now carry heavy machine guns instead of pistols, they also kill all bustas in an area when attacking which is vital when CJ gets the Fried Chicken upgrade. *Bigger Boxes - Serial Killers can now use their tools to steal tanks *Lynch Mobs - Niggers no longer turn hostile when the KFC-Truck gets destroyed, instead they get lynched *Yuri's Revenge - Crazy Ivans can plant bombs on everything, Tesla Troopers can attack aircraft and Desolators can kill the crews of vehicles *Advance Training - Snoipas can move once in a while and throw jars of piss. *Special Druid Training - Boris can attack planes and helicopters, call for Druid reinforcements and his migs are replaced with Kirovs *TURN UP THE RADIO - Wolf tanks can teleport, summon mobsters, heal themselves and deal absurd ammounts of damage *Mister Bubbles - The Razor now carries a Big Daddy instead of homosexual Canadians *What a Shame - JC Denton and Harley Filben now use Dragon Tooth Swords, Sniper Rifles and GEP Guns instead of useless shit *Ride Pimping - Putin's car gets four more 200mm cannons, an extra eye pocking device and can teleport, Putin's Airship can make enemies join your side and summon a supernova (great fun if combined with a black hole) *Serbian Butthurt - When the Eagle gets destroyed a bunch of butthurt Serbians appear, kill the pilot and then join your team, the Serbians are armed with rocket launchers and chainsaws. *POMF - The Hips Mover can cause enemies to rape other enemies on magically appearing beds *Fagetry - Upon death the faget drops a bunch of notes saying 'ur a faget' causing all nearby enemeis to go berserk and kill each other *Missile Whoring - Makes Phantoms cost 0$ and be built almost instantly Faction Divisions Yuri also has a bunch of faggots who do shit for him while he drinks vodka and watches porn. A true hero. * Rush Division - Marshall C&C Player *Nigger Division - General Tyrone, Nigger General *Hipster Division - Generals are too mainstream. *Druids Division - General Druid, Very Dangerous. Generals Promotions & Powers You thought the shit above was bad? well take a look at this beauty. Rank 1 Promotions *Druidic Training - All Russian units are now very dangerous *Summon Halo - Summons Halo, eh is pretty cool guy who kills alliens and doesn't afraid of anything *Sticks and Stones - Stick Conscripts can now throw stones, effectively turning them into the forth best unit in the game (Behind Druids, JC Denton and Vladimir Putin) *ur a faget - Call the enemy general a faget, causing him to execute all his elite soldiers out of butthurt Rank 3 Promotions *Hipster Research - Give you a bunch of obscure technologies *Nigerian Support - Unlocks the feared N-G-419. *SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSupport - Summons Creepers, its a nice base the enemy has. *Druidic Support Level 1 - Calls in 10 Druids. *Druidic Support Level 2 - Calls in 10 Druids, 5 Elite Druids and a Druid Tanks. *Druidic Support Level 3 - Calls in 20 Druids, 10 Elite Druids, 2 Druid Tanks and a Druid Commander *Putin's Warcry Level 1 - Putin makes enemies in a large area shit themself, stunning them. *Putin's Warcry Level 2 - Putin makes enemies in a large area kill themself. * Putin's Warcry Level 3 - Putin makes enemies in a large area join your side *Strategic Bombing Level 1 - Calls in 30 Kirovs to bomb the shit out of an area *Strategic Bombing Level 2 - Calls in 100 Kirovs to bomb the shit out of an area *Strategic Bombing Level 3 - Putin's Airship does a flyby of an area, leaving no survivors. Rank 5 Promotions *ADAAAAAAAAAAAAAM - David Sarif appears and gives all your units augs they never asked for. *Druidic Assault Force - Calls in 30 Druids, 15 Elite Druids, 5 Druid Tanks, 4 Druid Artillery, A Druid Commander and a Cyberdruid. * OH MY GOD - Some guy called Bob arrives in the SD Lucifer to fuck the enemies of the Motherland up. * JC - JC Denton joins your team. * A BOMB - A bomb appears inside every enemy unit, yes even the infantry. Category:Factions